We Don't Succeed or Fail at Meditation

We've dedicated much virtual ink lately to the merits of integrating small moments of mindfulness many time throughout the day. There are similarly compelling merits to engaging in longer periods of formal practice, on our own and in groups, with long stretches of silence and space for exploration.

Those longer sits can feel daunting, though, and we often believe that “my mind is too active” to sit in silence for more than a few minutes.

This belief speaks to the false premise that meditation is something that one either does or doesn’t do well, and that “doing it well” means sitting perfectly still with no thoughts arising.

But we can recapture the true meaning of meditation, returning it to its roots. Meditation reflects a willingness to become familiar with what is going on in the present moment, to explore our experience, and to hold it in tender, accepting awareness.

Our experience at any given time might include having a busy mind, or a fidgety body. Rather than seeing these as signs of inability or failure, we have the wonderful, rich opportunity to see the moment for what it is - a moment when the mind is busy or the body fidgety - and to hold that gently, like a small bird in the palms of our cupped hands, feeling it breathe, noticing its warmth, beholding it with wonder. Not needing it to be anything other than what it is, or the way it is.

Ironically, when we behold the busy mind with tender awareness, over time, the busy mind may quiet. But a quiet mind isn’t success, just as a busy mind isn’t failure. A quiet mind is just a quiet mind, there to be held with tender awareness.

Give it a try, even just for 5 minutes. Take your seat. Bring attention to what it feels like to be in your body in that moment. Place your attention on the feeling of the breath or the sounds around you. When you become aware that the mind is busy, ask yourself, “And? So? The mind is busy.” You might even add, “Huh. This is busy mind. Holding busy mind with kindness.”

Whatever arises can be allowed, accepted, explored and held with that same curious and kind attention.

Put another way, it is not the contents of the moment that determine the quality of the practice, but the the way we hold them.

If you'd like to try this out in community, we hope you'll join our 7AM conference call meditation on Thursdays. After a short introduction, we sit in silence together with occasional prompts to call us back gently if we've wandered off: a great chance to practice letting go of the notion of success or failure in meditation. (Simply dial (857) 799-9498 to participate).

Join us anytime in person, by conference call or by Zoom, or virtually via the many recorded meditations on the website. Click here to see our full schedule.

May all beings feel the ease of holding the moment just as it is,
Your CMP Family